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Monday, October 31, 2016

Quiet Extraverts and Outspoken Introverts--A Perspective on Talking and Solitude


  • Are extraverts people who 'can't shut up' or spend time alone?
  • Are introverts people who are timid, and shy wallflowers that have difficulty speaking up?
  • What really makes the difference between introverts and extraverts--and why does it matter?
  • How is it you can have quiet extraverts and outspoken introverts?
  • Which side of the 'vert' spectrum do you prefer to live?



Hi, my name is Susan and I'm an extraverted writer, artist and explorer of life

Contrary to what you may think, extraverts aren't people who talk all the time. We are better defined by being energized or stimulated by the outer world.

Extraverts are great at getting things going. We don't wait until we know what we're thinking or where we're going—we just jump into the conversation and start to explore (which can look messy to introverts).

As an extraverted writer, artist and explorer of life I like to toss out my latest interests to others to see what they know or what might come back that furthers my vision. 

And true to my extraverted nature,  I check in with everyone before I begin—listening to stories, concerns, and perspectives--getting inspired to act on the world in some fashion. 

My time is oft spent meandering down a run-on-sentence experience that flows from one never-ending fascination in the world to another while enjoying hours of solitude or listening.

So.....if extraverts aren't people who 'can't shut up' and who may enjoy hours of solitude—what really makes the difference between introverts and extraverts? How is it you can have quiet extraverts and outspoken introverts. Which camp do you prefer to live in—and why does it matter?



Where Do You Prefer to Spend More Time~Out in the World or In your Head?



The Key Question: What Energizes You? 

  • Do you prefer to work alone or with other people?
  • What do you do when you need to re-energize after a long day?
  • Do you prefer to think before you speak or do you prefer to just jump in and figure things out as you go?
  • When you begin a new project, do you prefer to check in with other people to find out what they think or do you prefer to delve into your own research to determine what you think?
  • When you want to relax do you prefer to interact with the world outside you or do you prefer to escape into your inner world?



Extraverts and Introverts are not defined by ability to talk or be quiet


While some may describe extraversion as an addiction to talking or an inability to shut up this just isn't the case any more than introversion is an inability to speak up. There are quiet extraverts and outspoken introverts. And we all need quiet and solitude in our day to be effective. 

Knowing your true preference for introversion or extroversion helps you understand how to better manage your time and stress; how to be your most effective self; and how to live your most satisfying life.

Extraversion and introversion are better understood as the way we prefer to pay attention to and explore our lives, and therefore what tends to energize us.


If you're an extravert you prefer to scan and interact with the world outside yourself; Extraverts' interests --whose attention turns to the outer world--have broad, expansive interests. 



If you're an introvert you prefer to scan and interact with the world inside your head; Introverts' interests-- whose attention turns inward--have narrower, deeper interests.

One is not better than the other—it's just different preferences playing out.



Are You an Innie or an Outie? Where does your attention go more often?

Which world holds your attention more--the inner world or the outer world around you? While we all must live in both worlds to balance our lives, we spend more time in the world we prefer.


Outies  Extraverts are energized and stimulated by interacting with the people and things in the world around them and tend to spend more time 'out there'.

Innies  Introverts are energized and stimulated by interacting with ideas and thoughts inside their head and tend to spend more time 'in their heads'.


Introverts prefer the world inside their heads

If you are an innie, or introvert, you are more private and independent in your approach to solving problems. You hold conversations in your head and may even think you answered that person with the puzzled expression who never got an answer to his question. You tend to hold your own counsel rather than checking in with others.

Innies are interested in understanding the world and less interested in changing it. Once you gain your AHA! moment you may feel your job is done. Now the fun begins inside your head as you reflect on fully comprehending what you learned so you can delve deeper into what interests you.

To do your best work and re-energize yourself:


  • Give yourself time to think before meetings when you're expected to speak up. That way you can have fully-formed thoughts ready to articulate.
  • Ask ahead of time what questions others need you to answer.
  • Write your thoughts and ideas down.
  • Give yourself quiet time to regroup throughout your day. It's hard work for an innie to be in the outer world all day.


Extraverts feel compelled to change the world.

If you are an outie, or extravert, you are more comfortable in the outer world, check in with others more, and appear to be more of an open book to others. 
Outies are interested in understanding the world so they can change it. Faced with your AHA! moment you may feel your job has just started. Now the fun starts as you set about communicating what you've learned with others. You feel compelled to change the world.

To do your best work and re-energize yourself:
  • Find people who like to engage in lively brainstorming sessions that allow you to just jump in and discover what you think--messy or not.
  • Do something interactive with new information for better learning—don't read instructions--have someone show you how to set up a streaming device or new app; talk to others to discover what they think; draw a picture to visualize an idea; walk and talk through an idea.
  • Engage in active undertakings to relax—garden, paint, walk, write, tinker with the computer, or go hiking.



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For more than 35 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes changing easier than ever before.

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Saturday, October 29, 2016

Practice Mindfulness and Gratitude--May There be Peace within You Today





Are You Listening? 

How many times have you been sent this or other simple messages from an angel in your life--someone who takes the time to wish you well? What did you do with the message? Delete it? Read it impatiently so you could hurry on with your day?

It doesn't matter what your spiritual leanings are. It isn't about whether you believe in Saints, religion or angels. It is about someone thinking about YOU and wishing you well. This simple blessing is worth a moment of contemplation each and every time you receive it. 



Practice Mindfulness

I receive this blessing at least every other month. When it arrives I stop and do something with it to let the message seep in. I read it as if I have never seen it before--and I read it as if the person who sent it really cares. Discover the meaning in the words for your life today by asking questions.

💜 Where in my life am I feeling anxious, cluttered, or hurried? Let it go.

💜 Where is it I'm trying to get to in my life that isn't here? Relax--I am exactly where I am meant to be.

💜 Where have I closed myself in? Remember the vast possibilities available to me.

💜 What are my gifts? Am I giving them to the world fully today? Who do I need to pass the love onto today? Who needs to know they are loved?

💜 Where in my life do I lack a feeling of contentment? Let it go. Rest in the knowledge I am a child of God and all is well in my world.

💜 How can I let this seep into my bones? Today I will fully give of myself and contribute enthusiastically to the world around me.

We all need to be mindful of the blessings and well-wishing that surrounds our day. May there be peace within you.


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For more than 35 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes changing easier than ever before.


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Friday, October 28, 2016

Why We Love Dogs



You can say any fool thing to a dog, and the dog will give you this look 

that says, My God, you're RIGHT! I NEVER would've thought of that!

Dave Barry




If I could be half the person my dog is I’d be twice the human I am.


Charles Yu




In order to really enjoy a dog, one doesn't merely try to train him

to be semi-human. The point of it is to open oneself to 

the possibility of becoming partly a dog.

Edward Hoagland 



To err is human—to forgive, canine.

Unknown



A dog is the only thing that can mend a crack in your broken heart.

Judy Desmond





When an eighty-five pound mammal licks your tears away, 

then tries to sit on your lap, it’s hard to feel sad.

Kristan Higgins




There is nothing truer in this world than the love of a good dog.


Mira Grant




The greatest pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself 

with him and not only will he not scold you, 

but he will make a fool of himself too.


Samuel Butler




My dogs have been the reason I have woken up every single day 

of my life with a smile on my face.


Jennifer Skiff





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For more than 35 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes changing easier than ever before.

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Tuesday, October 25, 2016

You are not Your Mistakes: 3 Steps to Learn from Poor Decisions and Mistakes


She Was All Dressed Up Like a Rainbow Trout, 
Swimming Upstream in the World
'Please, Please, I've lost my way, 
The current is too strong.'
Gordon Lightfoot

'Happy Mistakes' On the Road to Destruction 

Mistakes. We've all made them. Wrong turns. We've all taken them.

Yes, I'm talking to you.

Admit it--there's nothing like coming face-to-face with an ugly, icky, scary result of a decision you made for bringing your travel down that road of destruction to a screeching halt.

While you may find it difficult to get behind the idea of 'Happy Mistakes' for some of your 'disasters', perhaps you can accept all mistakes are useful for putting you back on the path to a more useful, and meaningful life as you seek to shed the skin of negativity and repel the repugnant alternative you discovered on your 'road to destruction'. 




Finding Your Way Back Home
'Experience is the toughest teacher because she gives the test first, and then the lesson.' Unknown

Sometimes it takes the stark reality of learning what you don't want for you to discover what you do want. After you've spent as much time as you need to contemplate your disastrous decisions, hit the refresh button and start over.  

While it's good to own your mistakes it's also good to learn from them then let them go. In any moment of crisis you're on the brink of destruction at the very moment you're also on the brink of a breakthrough. The trick is to take a step beyond the moment of making a poor decision or mistake to find the lesson that splits your life wide open in a positive direction. 


When you're ready to start fresh: Let go of guilt. Let go denigrating yourself. Let go beating yourself up. Get busy using your mistakes and poor decisions as learning lessons to guide your next steps. 




3 Steps to Turn Your Mistakes into Learning Experiences 
And BLAST YOUR LIFE WIDE OPEN!

1. Make a list of what you've learned YOU DON'T WANT in your life. For example:

I don't want to:

  • Work with people I don't like.
  • Be unfaithful in my relationship.
  • Hurt the people I love.
  • Work in this industry anymore.
  • Be abused at work or home.
  • Drink or do drugs.
  • Be scrapping by.
  • Be with people who treat me poorly.
  • Be with people who bring out the worst in me.
  • Feel unworthy.
  • Be unethical.
  • Stay in this job.
  • Be bored.
  • Drift through life.

2. Convert your 'I don't want' list into an 'I WANT TO' list. For example:

I want to:
  • Work with people I like.
  • Be in a committed relationship.
  • Be respectful and caring of my loved ones.
  • Seek a new satisfying career.
  • Seek healthy relationships.
  • Seek healthy workplace.
  • Fully engage in life and work.

3. Stay open to--and say yes to--activities you know will lead you on a journey towards the life you want. 

When opportunity comes knocking, answer the call. 

Use your 'I WANT' list to guide you in what you say Yes to.
  • Has someone offered to counsel and guide you? Say Yes and Thank You.
  • Has someone offered to introduce you to people at work? Say Yes and go for meet and greet.
  • Has someone offered to go out for coffee and a chat? Say Yes and Go.
  • Has a new career option caught your eye? Step in and stay open to the possibilities.
  • Has your loved one offer to 'stop and start over'? Say Yes and step into exploring what a healthy relationship means.

Keep looking for ways to open doors to a satisfying future and step through.

'You are not the mistakes you have made; you are the lessons you have learned.'  
Chris Cook


'What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters, compared to what lies within us.' Ralph Waldo Emerson

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Susan J Meyerott loves helping people become more fully themselves, particularly those working through anxiety, life and career transitions, relationships, and self-esteem issues. She provides a nonjudgmental, growth-oriented environment for you to become the person you’re meant to be—while appreciating the richness of who you already are. Learn more at Lightarted Living Blog

Saturday, October 22, 2016

Feel Good, Do Good, Be Good : Live with Integrity and Graciousness




'When you choose to act with integrity and graciousness, you are strengthened by your experiences; when you choose to act out of ego, fear, anger, retaliation or hate, you are hardened by your life experiences.' 

Small Daily Decisions over a Lifetime Determine Your Life Satisfaction  

You are the only one who sees behind your eyes and deep into your heart. Only you know whether you act with integrity. 
Life is full of intrigue and drama--especially in love and work. Every day we make small decisions about getting in, staying in, or getting out of relationships. Our choices ultimately determine the course of our life and how satisfied we are.

The one constant throughout your life is you--you are the only one who travels in your innermost circle 24/7. You are the only one who sees behind your eyes and deep into your heart. Only you know whether you act with integrity.



Acting with Integrity Gives You Strength

While choosing to act with integrity may feel scary or uncomfortable when you're in the midst of turmoil, after the emotional fog lifts you can see this is what strengthens you for life ahead.

Acting with integrity is what gives you the strength to be brave enough to speak up the next time in such a way as to achieve the best outcomes--despite your initial dis-ease.

Make a conscious decision to be strengthened, not hardened by your life experiences.

Putting Your Integrity to the Test

  • In the last three days--what decisions did you face about how to conduct yourself? Would you say you acted with integrity and graciousness? If not, why not? What could you do differently to improve?
  • Is there a time in your past you acted without integrity that fills you with regret? How can you let that go, and choose to feel good about your actions today? 



Something to Think about: Words to Live By

"Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody's going to know whether you did it or not." Oprah Winfrey

"The integrity of men is to be measured by their conduct, not by their words." Junius

"Integrity means that you are the same in public as you are in private." Joyce Meyer

"You are in integrity when the life you are living on the outside matches who you are on the inside." Alan Cohen

"If you have integrity, nothing else matters. If you don't have integrity, nothing else matters." Alan K. Simpson

"Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous and dreadful." Samuel Johnson

"Nothing more completely baffles one who is full of trick and duplicity, than straightforward and simple integrity in another." Charles Caleb Colton

"Calamity is the test of integrity." Samuel Richardson

"Tragedy in life normally comes with betrayal and compromise, and trading on your integrity and not having dignity in life. That's really where failure comes." Tom Cochrane

"Perhaps the surest test of an individual's integrity is his refusal to do or say anything that would damage his self-respect." Thomas S. Monson

"Goodness is about character - integrity, honesty, kindness, generosity, moral courage, and the like. More than anything else, it is about how we treat other people." Dennis Prager

"Once you get rid of integrity the rest is a piece of cake." Larry Hagman



Do You Choose to Act with Integrity and Graciousness?

  • Who are you? How do you choose to live your life? Would you say you act with integrity and graciousness?
  • How do others view you?  Would friends and family say you are gracious and act with integrity?
  • Are your internal beliefs in sync with your actions? How do you feel when you act out of integrity?
  • Twenty years from now, will others say you lived with integrity--and will you feel good about your actions today?

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For more than 35 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes changing easier than ever before.


If you're interested in learning more about closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be, sign up for free e-mail subscription.

Thursday, October 20, 2016

Let the Good Times Roll! When Happiness and Good Times Return



Happiness

Relish Your Good Fortune 

Sometimes when you've been down so long you don't even remember what it feels like to be up. But sometimes--when you least expect it--happiness and good times show up on your doorstep. Then what? How do you act? What do you do?


Good Times

How to Act when Happiness and Good Times Return

Don't chastise them for being late--and don't call them liars and send them away again. Instead, treat Happiness and Good Times as honored guests--welcome to stay as long as they'd like.

Treat Happiness and Good Times as honored guests--welcome to stay as long as they'd like.

Take them for long walks through town to reacquaint them with your environment. Dress them up and show them off to everyone you meet. Let them shine.

Take them out with friends and loved ones to welcome them home.  Share their sparkle and let their fairy dust sprinkle on those you love.


Share the sparkle of happiness and good times with loved ones.

Sit quiet and let them whisper words of love and encouragement in your ear. Trust them to speak truth to you, and then help them build a soft nest to rest in your heart. Thank them for coming home to roost.


Let happiness and good times whisper words of love and encouragement.

Leave the Door Open  for Happiness

If you've been down so long you don't remember how to feel good, leave the door open for happiness and good times to return. Keep a positive expectation for the good times to show up.



Keep a green tree in your heart
and perhaps a singing bird will come.

Chinese Proverb



Build a soft nest in your heart for happiness and good times to reside.

Thank you happiness and good times for coming home to roost!

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For more than 35 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes changing easier than ever before.

If you're interested in learning more about closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be, sign up for free e-mail subscription.