Ralph Waldo Emerson: The Only Way Out of Our Darkest Moments

'Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.'      

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Finding Our Way in Difficult Times

We all face difficult times throughout life--and who among us wants to stay stuck in the dark days any longer than we have to? We all long to discover that deep inner strength and indomitable spirit we possess to help us find our way out. 

We can learn a lot from Ralph Waldo Emerson's sage outlook on living from that place of strength and courage. What does he have to show us about how can we can enjoy a better life-- experiencing more good times than bad--and getting out of the depths of despair sooner? 

Emerson said no matter what the problem you're dealing with, keep your focus on your dreams, not your problems.

The Only Way Out of Our Darkest Moments

Sometimes in the overwhelming challenge of trying to recover from devastating losses or illnesses you can be left feeling discouraged, hopeless and isolated. Looking through the lens of defeat and loss, life can begin to feel flat and meaningless.

The key to pulling out of the darkness is to change the filter you look through to gain a fresh perspective. Or as Ralph Waldo Emerson said, 'Don't be pushed by your problems. Be led by your dreams.'

When you're dispirited and feeling low it may feel like an impossible task to change your perspective. You don't exactly feel perky and positive. Yet, changing your focus from your problems and the seemingly insurmountable obstacles you face to putting the focus back on creating a life based on your dreams and aspirations IS the only way out.

I Know it Hurts--Just Push into the Pain

When I was in labor with my first child I failed to dilate fully so my doctor manually stretched me during the contractions that occurred one minute apart. This was the most painful and seemingly never ending process I've ever experienced. I could barely remain conscious the pain was so excruciating.

With contractions coming every minute, I would fall into a deep sleep for 45 seconds before the contractions would wake me up and the unbearable pain would start all over. As the doctor stretched me (60 times an hour) he kept saying 'I know it hurts, just push into the pain'. It took all my resolve not to kick him in the groin and tell him 'YOU push into the pain!'

But even in my darkest moment somewhere in the deep recesses of my mind I knew when I eventually got out of what turned out to be 24 hours of hard labor, that comment, 'I know it hurts, just push into the pain', would become a metaphor for my life.

It is one of the beautiful compensations in this life that no one can sincerely try to help another without helping himself.   Ralph Waldo Emerson

If Pain is the Teacher, What's the Lesson?

Birthing a new life--literally or figuratively has it's painful moments--but when you push into the pain and stay focused on your dreams you move through it to gain a new life. It isn't always pleasant or easy but when you achieve a dream it's worth it in the end.

There is no way to avoid or go around the painful part of life on our way to achieving our dreams. No one 'has it easy'. But if each day we keep our eyes on the goal, instead of the obstacles, we allow ourselves to be led by our dreams instead of pushed by our problems, making it easier to endure the difficulties along the way. 

What are the Darkest Moments you've Recently or are Currently Facing? 

• Breakup of a relationship, family or home;
• Loss of job or income;
• Loss of home in a disaster;
• Loss of freedom--incarceration;
• Loss of a loved one;
• Loss of innocence--dealing with abuse issues;
• Loss of health--you or loved one dealing with a serious illness or injury.

Are You Ready to Refresh Your Life? 

Discover the switch to bring forth the deep inner strength and indomitable spirit you possess to find your way out of your current difficulties. Practice flipping the switch daily from focusing on your problems to focusing on your dreams.

3 Questions to Reset Your Outlook Daily

• Where do I feel pushed by my problems? 
• If I were led by my dreams what would I do differently? 
• If I had all the time and money in the world, what would I do with my life NOW? 

'The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.'    Ralph Waldo Emerson

Sign Up for Free E-mail updates

Susan J Meyerott loves helping people become more fully themselves, particularly those working through anxiety, life and career transitions, relationships, and self-esteem issues. She provides a nonjudgmental, growth-oriented environment for you to become the person you’re meant to be—while appreciating the richness of who you already are. Learn more at Lightarted Living Blog

Let It Go: How to Accept Stress as Normal and Move On

What's Bothering You?

Do you sometimes feel you are a victim of circumstance as you face one daily stress after another? Can't seem to catch a break? When you look around does it feel like other people are having a better life than you? 

Then now's the time to change your mindset and let go of playing the victim in your own life. When you let go of the mindset working against you, you'll discover your most robust self takes the lead. 

Daily life is a continuous cycle of stress and relaxation. Moment by moment we all face challenges that require us to respond. This is the essence of the stress response--and of life.

The tension created by our challenges isn't a bad thing. The daily stressors simply create a heightened awareness in us that we must decide how we want to proceed with life. Once we make a decision--and take action--our stress resolves or lessens and we return to a more relaxed state.

To let go of the stress 'putting you over the edge' or 'getting on your last nerve' in a timely manner you must identify what it is. If you just ignore or deny what's really going on you leave those things eating away at you in the back of your head to boil and fester until they spew out and splatter everyone around you while you remain stuck--playing the victim in your own life.

When we use words like 'it' and 'stuff' to talk about what's bothering us, it allows us to gently tip-toe around naming what's bothering us. 'It's bothering me' or 'all this stuff is getting to me' are lovely non-specific descriptions allowing us to remain socially polite and seemingly still in-control as we voice our tension to others.

To successfully get on with living the life we want we must move beyond these diffuse terms keeping us mired in a cesspool of fear and anxiety--and specifically identify what's got our attention.

Come Clean: Name What's Holding You Back Today

·                     What's happening in your life at this moment? 

·                     What's making you feel tense?

·                     What do you feel you should be doing you're not?

·                     How are you failing to live up to someone else's expectations or your own?

 Looking over the last three days, what's stressing you out? Pick one situation to describe in uncensored detail in your head--and let it rip!

As you focus on your recent stress-inducing incident notice any changes in your body as you merely think about it. What happens to your heart beat and breathing? Do you notice any discomfort in your head or stomach? Are you aware of clenching your teeth or tightening your jaw; tension in your neck, back or other muscles? Do you feel tearful or angry?

Our stress-inducing experience has the ability to cause tension as we merely think about it. We don't even need to experience it to bring the stress-response on. That's why it is so important to specifically name the stuff that's bothering you--so you can stop stuffing it and move on faster.

Get Back to Your Healthy, Robust Self 

'Tension is who you think you should be; Relaxation is who you are.'  Chinese Proverb

Why not accept your daily life consists of a continuous cycle of stress and relaxation--and choose to face the discomfort and step into action sooner?

It is the living in a 'world of shoulds' without taking action that creates the tension and discomfort in us and throws us into a mental fog, leaving us feeling overwhelmed for longer periods of time.

If you care about being your healthiest, most robust self, give up playing the victim in your life. Choose to consciously identify what's causing your tension and bringing out the full stress-response. Name it then choose to engage in actions that puts you back living in the state of relaxation of who you really are—pursuing a life with purpose and meaning.

Trust yourself to hold the key to being your best self. Act on what you know to be right for you. Take the steps that will help you feel fully alive, fully productive, and fully engaged. Be brave.

Sign Up for Free E-mail updates

Susan J Meyerott loves helping people become more fully themselves, particularly those working through anxiety, life and career transitions, relationships, and self-esteem issues. She provides a nonjudgmental, growth-oriented environment for you to become the person you’re meant to be—while appreciating the richness of who you already are. Learn more at Lightarted Living Blog

Stop it! You are not Defective~You are Strong and Host to all the Marvels in Creation

'If you are a card-carrying human being, chances are you share the same fear as all other humans: the fear of losing love, respect and connection to others. And if you are human, in order to avoid or prevent the pain, trauma and perceived devastation of the loss, you will do anything to avoid your greatest fear from being visited on you.'    Iyanla Vanzant

No matter what you're going through; no matter what the past~open yourself up to all the marvels of creation you have to offer the world as you step past your current conundrum (of which there's sure to be one). 

Our struggles strengthen us and give us something to push against while growing our hearts and compassion for others. Why waste one of the world's greatest asset--your active participation? Why hide your gifts from the world? Who are you to horde your talents?

Don't let self-doubt or feelings of inadequacy force you into hiding. When you discover you've retreated from the world feeling shameful about being defective or inadequate, take one small step a day to come out of hiding.  Get the focus off YOU and put it where it belongs--on how to best serve others.

Ask yourself: 

• How can I best serve the world, my community and my family? 
• What is one thing I can do today to contribute to those around me?
• What one thing can I do today to better position myself for serving in my community?
• What is one thing I can do today to make a difference for one person?

Stop fixating on your inadequacies. When you take the focus off you and put it on serving others instead, you'll stop ruminating on your weaknesses and fears and allow your life to naturally emerge out of your strengths and caring for others.

'Compassion is the unfettered yearning that responds to the world with noble heart, the understanding that others are just like us. Radiating from basic goodness like the sun, compassion lifts us above self-involvement and brings us out of the Dark Age. Just like the sun behind a cloud, it shines through our self-centeredness.'       Sakyong Mipham

Sign Up for Free E-mail updates

Susan J Meyerott loves helping people become more fully themselves, particularly those working through anxiety, life and career transitions, relationships, and self-esteem issues. She provides a nonjudgmental, growth-oriented environment for you to become the person you’re meant to be—while appreciating the richness of who you already are. Learn more at Lightarted Living Blog

Having Self-Doubts? Embrace Your Audacious Spirit

Unselfconsciously Fully-Engaged in Life

When you embrace your Audacious Spirit , you put fear aside to unselfconsciously show the fully engaged and fully alive person you are: You embolden yourself to seek justice; right wrongs; go where others have not; think differently; and step over boundaries and past barriers to unleash your best talents and self. 

An Audacious Spirit Promotes Strength

Unlike possessing a brassy, bossy, or bully spirit, an audacious spirit is one that promotes your strength to meet the world head on rather than one that is determined to control others into submission.

Let Obstacles and Difficulties Spur You into Audacious Action

We are all spurred into audacious action through coming face-to-face with difficulties and self-doubt. 

While your initial response is to retreat from obstacles and difficulties, the discomfort of the situation rekindles your naturally audacious spirit to do battle. 

After hiding inside, suddenly you'll discover the strength to once again speak up and act in ways that create the type of workplace, community, family, relationship or life you want.  

Be Audacious! Embrace and Reframe Experiences Causing Self-Doubt

Choose to embrace and redirect life experiences that cause you to doubt yourself. Don't be afraid of the difficulties and don't be afraid of retreating into yourself in response to the blow you take from dealing with them. 

Reframe what is happening when you retreat--learn to sit in the discomfort and view it as a time to regroup and build up your indomitable spirit to reemerge fully prepared to face life boldly and courageously. Then get out there and meet life head on.

Today I am Audacious!

Extremely bold and daring; 

Recklessly brave and fearless;

Shameless Bold and Brazen;

Extremely Original and Highly Inventive;

Recklessly bold in defiance of convention; 

Lively; Unrestrained; Uninhibited;

Courageous, Dauntless, Venturesome;

Unabashed, Shameless; Impertinent, Forward.

Get out there!

BE YOUR MOST AUDACIOUS SELF!

Get the Job

Get The Man/Woman

Get The LIFE

Fight for  GOOD HEALTH

CREATE THE LIFE YOU WANT

Sign Up for Free E-mail updates

For more than 35 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes changing easier than ever before. 


Do you know someone who could benefit from uplifting messages? Please share Lightarted Living with them. If you or someone you love is interested in learning more about closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be, join the Lightarted Living mailing list. Sign up for free e-mail updates.

Rumi: Your Heart and My Heart are very Old Friends

Your heart and my heart

are very old friends. 

Rumi

The breezes at dawn

have secrets to tell you

LISTEN

Don’t go back to sleep!

You must ask 

for what you really want.

Your heart and my heart

are very old friends. 

Rumi

Sign Up for Free E-mail updates

For more than 35 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes changing easier than ever before.


Do you know someone who could benefit from uplifting messages? Please share Lightarted Living with them. If you or someone you love is interested in learning more about closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be, join the FREE Lightarted Living mailing list. 

Rumi~You must ask for what you really want

The breezes at dawn have secrets to tell you

Don’t go back to sleep!

You must ask for what you really want.

Don’t go back to sleep!

People are going back and forth

across the doorsill where the two worlds touch,

The door is round and open

Don’t go back to sleep! 

Rumi, 13th-century Persian poet

You must ask for what you really want.

Don’t go back to sleep!

Sign Up for Free E-mail updates

For more than 35 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes changing easier than ever before.

Do you know someone who could benefit from uplifting messages? Please share Lightarted Living with them. If you or someone you love is interested in learning more about closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be, join the FREE Lightarted Living mailing list. 

Shut Up and Listen!

IMAGINE

Imagine everyone else is enlightened except you.  

When you do things from your soul, you have: 

• No ego;
• No point to prove;
• No pride or image to protect.

You are open, trusting, interested and engaged in life and seeking to learn from all the enlightened people around you. Imagine how that would feel...like a river moving in you.

A WISE MAN ONCE SAID NOTHING

Now imagine how it feels when you're led by pride. Feeling stuck and perhaps defeated by circumstances, pride leads you to 'protect your fragile ego by going underground to work things out while rejecting all offers to help. The ego tells you to maintain a good face and hold on to presenting a good image even as panic and anxiety builds inside. 

If we spend too much time locked up in our heads--going it alone--faulty thinking sets in and life comes to a frustrating standstill. 

Behind our eyes the fear, anger and frustration simmer as we view our lives from the vantage of the ego, instead of the soul. We 'yes, but' and pooh-pooh other's suggestions with impatience and contempt further locking us in a standoff with our best selves and assuring we remain stuck in a downward spiral. 

How do we reverse this to pick ourselves up and elevate ourselves to work from the level of our soul? Sometimes we just need to shut up and listen...as if everyone else was enlightened but us. 

As the saying goes, 'A wise man once said nothing.....'

SOUL SEARCHING

WHAT DO YOU WISH YOU COULD DO WITH YOUR LIFE?

• What are you struggling with at the moment? 
• What issue or problem are you trying to solve? 
• Where would you like to shoot your life forward?  
• Where have you been resisting help?

OPEN

Run a short experiment: Choose one or more people who have your best interest at heart to actively seek advice from. Listen to their advice without blocking what they say. 

Listen as if you are about to hear the one idea that will change your life. 

Suspend judgment by writing down their advice while asking clarifying questions and saying Thank You after each suggestion. 

Seek to act on the most enlightening suggestion. Ask yourself what the most enlightening suggestion is you will--without judgment or resistance--take action on.

Pledge to apply one piece of advice.

CHOOSE TO DO THINGS FROM YOUR SOUL

I wish to live a life that causes my soul to dance inside my body

Sign Up for Free E-mail updates

For more than 35 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes changing easier than ever before.

Do you know someone who could benefit from uplifting messages? Please share Lightarted Living with them. If you or someone you love is interested in learning more about closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be, join the FREE Lightarted Living mailing list.