When Life Kicks Your Butt, Retreat to your place of Calm
Last year, was one of those butt-kicking times for my husband and I when he was diagnosed with the big 'C'. Thankfully, a year and a half after he completed treatment he's cancer-free. With 95% of re-occurrences arising within the first year--his prognosis is excellent long term, and we're able to breathe a sigh of relief. But it wasn't always so.
Like others hit with a diagnosis of cancer we were shaken and fearful for the future. I practiced calming and centering myself as I sat alongside him during treatment by concentrating my attention on creating images of hope and comfort, and then sharing them with others.
At the time I fully intended to share the dragonfly in this post as an uplift for others experiencing life's challenges . But as I meandered through the blog I was surprised to discover I failed to post the dragonfly with its calming and forward-looking message. Perhaps I just wasn't done absorbing the message myself. Perhaps I was still 'the dog hiding under the porch licking it's wounds' and not ready to come out.
So as I sat with this image today, I thought about how much the simple message carried here was what got us through the radiation and chemotherapy--helping us to focus on one day and one moment at a time--while helping us set a positive expectation for the future. And I also realized how relevant it still was for helping us to continue to thrive today despite the jolts of fear that still rise up.
I'm in the Process of Positive Changes
All is Well
Calmness Surrounds Me
Don't Let Fear and Dread Bully You
"Breathe In~ 'This Moment'
Breathe Out~ 'This Breath'"
Mark Nepo, The Book of Awakening
After experiencing, then moving beyond, one of life's butt-kicking challenges we may breath that sigh of relief, but those underlying fears still linger long after the issue resolves--always ready to roar back to life. That's what holds us back from getting back into the groove of life and fully thriving.
You don't need to invite fear into your life. It charges into view uninvited in nanoseconds--catching you off guard and filling you with dread at the most inopportune moments.
Life is full of harrowing butt-kicking challenges. But you can't let fear and dread bully you into withdrawing from life. If you accept that tough times are a natural part of life you can choose a strategy for calming and centering yourself in the moment to help you move past the fear and dread faster.
Unlike fear and dread racing in uninvited, we must consciously and deliberately invite calmness and a sense of peace into our lives after fear and dread march in to bully our senses.
Learn to Focus Your Breathing when Fear and Dread Make an Appearance
We aren't in control of our lives when we're anxious and fear-lead. When we're calm and centered we're able to take charge of our lives, live more peacefully, and make better decisions.
The proper response to the fear, anxiety and dread bullies is always to find your way back to being calm and centered. Feeling out-of-control and helpless keeps you trapped in a fear cycle.
Some people feel silly consciously practicing breathing. It feels a little 'Woo-Woo. If this is you--and you want to get back in the groove and thrive after the three bullies arrive--you'll need to let go of feeling silly to methodically and calmly execute centered breathing. Think of centered breathing as a way to inspire yourself in your moment of fear--breathing life back into your dis-spirited self.
'Inspire' literally means in-spirit---or filled with a spirited, animated or exalted influence. It also means to inhale or 'to breathe life into'.
When you take a moment to practice Centered Breathing--with conscious and deliberately slow inhale and exhale--it focuses your attention on the moment--not future or past--and calls your 'calm nervous system' (parasympathetic) into play.
You don't need to go some place quiet (although that can help) to center yourself with slow, focused breathing. You can take a moment at your desk or out on a walk. You can do a short set of slow, focused breaths driving to or from work. You can practice while drying dishes, taking a shower, or pulling weeds. You can prepare yourself before a presentation or meeting, or on your way to treatment or surgery.
Mark Nepo, who wrote The Book of Awakening after he dealt with his own bout of cancer, shared his very simple breathing technique, 'This Moment; This Breath'. You consciously and deliberately inhale and exhale while focusing your thoughts with "This moment" on inhale and 'This breath' on exhale.
"Breathe In~ 'This Moment'
Breathe Out~ 'This Breath'"
Mark Nepo, The Book of Awakening
"What you hope, you will eventually believe.
What
you believe you will eventually know.
What you know, you will eventually
create.
What you create, you will eventually experience.
What you experience,
you will eventually express.
What you express, you will eventually become.
This
is the formula for all of life."
Neale Donald Walsch
Choose to Thrive
No matter where you are in your life journey--at the beginning or towards the end, choose to make today a pleasure and to see yourself in the process of positive changes no matter your circumstances.
Take the Reins Riding Your Life's Dragon
Thrive
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