Getting Past Self-Doubt

 

Being Koi

Sometimes it's hard work putting yourself out in the world. Every time you're faced with a moment of transition in the workplace or on the home front, self-doubt and self-consciousness can float to the surface making you feel shy about putting yourself back out there. So how do you nudge yourself out of it?

Show up 

When you feel momentarily timid, take a tip from Koi and simply show up.  Stop being coy and hiding under a rock or in the weeds.  Be seen. Showing up is 80% of success.

Don't be coy, be KOI.

Who doesn't love sitting next to a Koi pond watching Koi gracefully move through the water. They aren't self-conscious about swimming and they don't overthink every move. They do what they were born to do: swim.

Accept you were born to swim with ease in big ponds and small. You'll naturally stand out when you show up and show yourself to be a willing and competent swimmer. Hiding behind a rock or in the weeds will do you no good. Stop overthinking and focus on swimming instead.

Be yourself and proudly swim into the thick of things. You are spectacular just as you are. 

If you want to stand out even without making a splash, Be Koi, not coy. 

We see ourselves for what we aren't; others see us for who we are.

 All Things Come to She who Baits

"Fishing is the pursuit of the elusive but attainable~a perpetual series of occasions for hope."    John Buchan 

Life can be thought of as a life-long fishing expedition in which we are 'in pursuit of the elusive but attainable~a perpetual series of occasions for hope'. This is an especially useful metaphor for dealing with work and landing the positions or clients you desire. 

As long as we keep sticking our pole in the water, we maintain hope we'll land the elusive but attainable fish we're after. And if we keep baiting the hook, eventually we'll land that fish. 

Notice, fish don't care how great a fisherman or woman you are. They care about the bait. This is true no matter the type of fish you're after--even clients or employers.

In moments when self-doubt arises, take the focus off you--the person--and put it on the bait for the fish you want to land. 

What is the alluring skill, talent or product the fish you want is attracted to?  What is the bait needed to land that particular fish? How can you bait that hook then sit back and wait?

I've always loved the Charlie Tuna commercial showing Charlie as a fish who prided himself as being a Tuna with 'good (artistic) taste' and the very clever tag-line, 'Sorry, Charlie; people want tuna that tastes good not tuna with good taste.' 

Like Charlie the Tuna, we need to stop focusing on ourselves and keep our eyes on how to fill a need--the bait--an employer or client wants. 

Bait and Switch

Sure, it matters how good a fisher you are when it's time to reel in the fish. But first you have to attract the fish and get it to bite--and that means letting the self-doubt go.

By doing a 'switch and bait'--switching from a self-conscious focus on yourself to a focus on the bait to attract the big fish--you open up oceans of possibilities for you to pursue without giving yourself another thought. 

Swimming in Possibilities