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Lightarted Living: Let it Go: Unlocking Your Frozen Emotions with Mus...: William R Brooksher, Photographer  'If you had to choose just one song to sustain you with happy memories for an eternity, what ...

Lightarted Living: Every Time I Lose a Dog They Take a Piece of My He...

Lightarted Living: Every Time I Lose a Dog They Take a Piece of My He...: ��FAREWELL 'HE WHO WILL NOT BE IGNORED'�� ANON Morning Memory  Every morning after finishing his breakfa...

Every Time I Lose a Dog They Take a Piece of My Heart

💔FAREWELL 'HE WHO WILL NOT BE IGNORED'💓

ANON

Morning Memory 

Every morning after finishing his breakfast, Arrow would come into the office where I'd be working on the computer. He'd greet me with a tail wag and a soft paw on my leg to tell me to turn around so I could massage him while he looked deeply into my eyes to memorize my soul.

Dogs never believe we're too busy to relate with them. They are 'the beings who will not be ignored'. They work tirelessly to keep 'the pack' together and balanced.

Thanks to one of my favorite dog lovers, Art Lipski, for reminding me of this great dog quote.


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For more than 35 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes letting go and moving forward with life easier than ever before.


Do you know someone who could benefit from uplifting messages? Please share Lightarted Living with them. If you or someone you love is interested in learning more about closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be, join the FREE Lightarted Living mailing list. 

Lightarted Living: All Good Dogs Go to Heaven--And All Dogs Are Good

Lightarted Living: All Good Dogs Go to Heaven--And All Dogs Are Good: Passing Softly into the Night Arrow the Perro  2004-2017 I Kept Expecting a Miracle I kept expecting a miracle...  Though p...

All Good Dogs Go to Heaven--And All Dogs Are Good

Passing Softly into the Night

Arrow the Perro 

2004-2017

I Kept Expecting a Miracle

I kept expecting a miracle... 

Though perhaps the miracle is to be loved

And then loosened into the greater love

And to go out on a river of tears~fully lived, fully loved, fully ready to be loosened.

Lee Bryant

Place where the Dogs are Loosened

'Dogs’ lives are too short. Their only fault, really.'

Agnes Sligh Turnbull

Me and My Arrow

The Con Man and the Dumpster Dog

Arrow found his way to my son when Sean was a homesick 17 year old exchange student living in Guanajuato, Mexico. Sean, away from home for the first time in another country, was lonely and missing having a sense of home so he found a way to create it. He got a dog.

Now that's the truth of the matter, but that's not the story Sean told us almost 14 years ago. No, the story he told was more heart-wrenching and dramatic.

When I first saw Arrow the Perro on a webcam I told Sean, 'You'd better find a home for that dog in Mexico. If you bring him back he's going straight to the pound!'

Sean, my little con man who knew his mother well just smiled and said, 'I'll take my chances on you.' He went on to say, 'I found a litter of pups in a dumpster and I tried to turn them in to the local shelter. They were full. But they said if I was willing to take one of the pups, they'd take the other two, so what could I do?'

So Arrow the Perro came home to live with us, becoming my dog while Sean went off to college and then on to adult life. 

It was much later--only after it became clear Arrow was going to be our forever dog despite eating Sean's bed and my jewelry; taking nips out of a few friends behinds; and generally being harder to train than our other soft-mouthed, Ginger-dog--that the truth came out.

'Oh Mom,' Sean confessed with a laugh, 'That was just a story I made up. I was lonely and I went to a vet's office where a friend got a pup.'

And there it is--home is where the dog is--and even young con men living far away from home and family can create a home with the comfort of a dog. 

Thanks to my little con man, I had a full-time companion who didn't leave my side for almost 14 years--unless I left him. He never tired of my company.

'There is nothing truer in this world than the love of a good dog.'

Mira

A dog is grateful for what is--which I am finding to be the soundest kind of wisdom and very good theology.

Carrie Newcomer

Bright-Eyed and Basenji-Tailed

'Dogs are often happier than men simply because the simplest things are the greatest things for them!'

Mehmet Murat Ildan

'The greatest pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself too.'

Samuel Butler

'You can usually tell a man is good if he has a dog who loves him.'

W. Bruce Cameron

'If your dog doesn’t like someone you probably shouldn’t, either.'

Unknown

The last walk together

We're all just walking each other home

'Many of the qualities that come so effortlessly to dogs—loyalty, devotion, selflessness, unflagging optimism, unqualified love—can be elusive to humans.'

John Grogan

'Blessed is the person who has earned the love of an old dog.'

Sidney Jeanne Seward 

'I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons.'

Will Rogers

'Dogs lead a nice life. You never see a dog with a wristwatch.'

George Carlin

RIP

💓Arrow the Perro

💙My Gringo Dingo

💚My Optimistic Opportunist 

💛My dog with the question mark of a tail

💗My Dog

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For more than 35 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes letting go and moving forward with life easier than ever before.


Do you know someone who could benefit from uplifting messages? Please share Lightarted Living with them. If you or someone you love is interested in learning more about closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be, join the FREE Lightarted Living mailing list. 

Lightarted Living: Keep it Simple--Create the Life You Want

Lightarted Living: Keep it Simple--Create the Life You Want:   " Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail ." Henry Wheeler Shaw Adults: Kids ...

Lightarted Living: Are You a Quiet Extravert or Outspoken Introvert?

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Lightarted Living: Letting Go: Yielding to 'What's to Be' when a Pet ...

Lightarted Living: Letting Go: Yielding to 'What's to Be' when a Pet ...: The Long Road Home On my long ride home from the Vet, and in possession of a two week treatment plan for my ailing dog, I thought...

Letting Go: Yielding to 'What's to Be' when a Pet is Terminally Ill

The Long Road Home

On my long ride home from the Vet, and in possession of a two week treatment plan for my ailing dog, I thought about how we try to prepare ourselves for the eventual loss of a pet. My almost 14 year old dog is sick with what I'm still hoping is an ulcer and not cancer. He's lost 13 pounds due to not eating enough to sustain his weight as he deals with an upset GI tract.

 But as I sat in my feelings, I realized that no matter how much we try to prepare ourselves, when the time comes nothing will take away the grief and ache in our hearts caused by the loss of a loved one--human or furry.  The best we can do is yield to what is to be--while persisting and enduring.

I know you're tired, but come this the way. Rumi

No Way Out--Only Through

On my way home I tried to think my way out of the situation--trying to see my way clear to a positive outcome. But in the end, I realized I needed to let go of my expectations for what was going to happen and by when. There was no way out of Arrow being sick, there was only the possibility of moving through the situation by laying out a treatment plan and then yielding to what is to be.

Old French Dictionary 'Laisser'

Laisser-Aller~Let it Be

At home, while I was still in the throes of coming to terms with 'there is no way out...only through', I opened an email from my sister-in-law, Lee, who shared a page with me she found in an old french dictionary defining 'laisser'. 

She knew I would find this torn page filled with wonderful words and yummy meanings she planned to use in an 'underpainting' interesting. I did.  It delivered just the right message at the right time.

Laisser-Courre~Place where the Dogs are Loosened

My eye was immediately caught by three definitions:

Laisser-aller~ease, freedom, unrestraint, easiness, yieldingness.

Laisser-courre~place where the dogs are loosened.

Laisser-passer~permit, leave, permission.

I  was compelled to write Lee back and share the impact those words had on me. The following correspondence ensued between two sisters coming to grips with grieving for the loss of their old dogs: 

"Lee--what an incredible find! It was perfect for me at this moment. Laisser-courre--place where the dogs are loosened--caught my attention. 

I'm back dealing with Arrow not eating and not being well. I went to the vet today and got a two week plan of action...with the understanding this could also be it. His weight has dropped from 64 lbs to 51 lbs. I am trying to take one day at a time and not look too far ahead while also preparing for the possibility that he's dealing with cancer. If he doesn't start eating consistently and gaining weight he isn't going to make it.

I got a supply of the slurry stuff that I told you about...and I read up on how I should be giving him the antacids with the slurry. I wasn't using it properly so I'm working on the theory that a change in timing for the antacid and slurry could get an improvement. I don't know until I try. I didn't understand that the slurry coats the gut giving it a layer of protection so any ulcers can heal. 

Think good thoughts for my sweet skinny dog. No matter how much we try to prepare for the inevitable death the truth is there is no way to prepare. We just have to sit with it and take it a day at a time. We need to sit quietly so we can determine if it's time to let go or not."

Laisser-Passer~Giving Permission to Leave

Lee to me:

"Well, I’m right there with you sister... Otter’s cancer is back they think...Cells in urine...do I want to test to see if it’s the same as before? No, probably not. They think it is, which is interesting, as they’ve been denying he even had cancer because he’s lived so long and so well...(cannibis) they know I treated him, but as I may have told you, they dismissed it as a misdiagnosis. Now they can’t do that. Good. 

Even so I’m left with the same inevitable passage to contemplate and I hate it too! I’ve pre-grieved plenty for this being and yet it hit me so hard last night and I wailed and wailed and then felt light as a feather! Damn good drugs those tears provide!

So, I could treat him again... tho times are different now... he’s older, more arthritic, dementia growing...very sweet boy. 

So, do I fight it in order to put off the inevitable (for me)? Or surrender him back to the ocean from whence he came, in his own time... laisser-courre. 

We are such a fighting minded people! I see myself swimming alongside his canoe... holding on with one hand...at some point, maybe when the river hits the ocean, I must let go and let him continue on alone. 

But as you say: one day at a time. One hour at a time. He’s mostly good right now. Still has a good appetite. I can tell tho, he’s not having as much of a good time."

Yielding to What's to Be

Death is a natural part of life, and we must come to terms with the reality that our beloved pets lives are shorter than ours.  In the end, it all comes down to our learning to 'swim in our grief' and yield to what's to be. 

For now I'll take solace in doing what I can do to make Arrow as comfortable as he can be, and then easing into a laissez-faire attitude of letting things take their own natural course. 

We love our furry companions and are grieved when we lose them. But we must find a way to yield them to 'the place where they're loosened' and permit them to leave us when it is their time to pass while helping to ease their way as comfortably as we are able.

Laisser-aller~ease, freedom, unrestraint, easiness, yieldingness.

Laisser-courre~place where the dogs are loosened.

Laisser-passer~permit, leave, permission.

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For more than 35 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes letting go and moving forward with life easier than ever before.

Do you know someone who could benefit from uplifting messages? Please share Lightarted Living with them. If you or someone you love is interested in learning more about closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be, join the FREE Lightarted Living mailing list. 

Lightarted Living: Three Tips for Surviving Change and Staying Health...

Lightarted Living: Three Tips for Surviving Change and Staying Health...: ' Our actions shift perspectives, whether it be your own or others .' John Edwards Stop the World I Want to Get Off!  You ...

Three Tips for Surviving Change and Staying Healthy

'Our actions shift perspectives, whether it be your own or others.'

John Edwards

Stop the World I Want to Get Off! 

You can’t do life without facing your share of overwhelming and stressful times. Perhaps you’re struggling with a new bout of upheaval now.

Sometimes when hit with an onslaught of too many changes—both good and bad—we’re knocked for a loop and we find it hard to catch our breath.

Change—whether good or bad—is stressful. Too many life events can stack up to create a barrage of details that overwhelm us. 

Whether you're getting married or getting divorced; starting a new job, getting a promotion, or losing your job and looking for work; house hunting or moving into a new home; dealing with an ongoing chronic illness or death in the family; starting a family or dealing with family issues--all changes add to your stress.

Change IS Life~Life IS Change 

When we face times of rapid change we must figure out how to make the most of it while finding our way to balance and calm ourselves or we’ll remain quivering in a puddle of helplessness.  

Like you, when I deal with too many changes at once, the ensuing anxiety and emotional fog tends to kick common sense and a clear vision for what I need to do to regain my balance and energy right out of my consciousness. 

Despite being a health promotion professional skilled in helping others move through stressful times, when I'm faced with times of rapid change I must stop to recall what I know about keeping myself healthy during highly stressful times. None of us are immune to dealing with the difficulties of life.

Sometimes it takes me a month to see my way through the fog--but here is what I always come back to: Three (oh-so-obvious-in hindsight) actions that help me regain my balance and put me back on the road to health.

Calm Yourself through Conscious Breathing 

Just Breathe. Conscious Breathing is the first step to pulling yourself out of the anxiety and stress.

When our heart rate gets above 100 beats/minute in a non-exercise state our brains get fuzzy. That is the emotional fog we experience due to our body's response to the stress.

Granted, when you're in a highly stressed state it can be amazingly difficult to begin conscious breathing. Sometimes you just have to keep practicing it--all the while 'acting as if' you believe it will calm you down. It will--just do it. 

When you retire for the night, practice focusing on your breathing to calm your racing heart.

Practice slowly and consciously breathing in and out--thinking 'I breathe in uplifting into my heart' and I breathe out calmness into my gut'.

Identify Your Stressors

As major life events pile up sending me into overwhelm mode I know I need to get a handle on what I’m dealing with. Over the years the Holmes-Rahe Life Change Index has been my go-to-guide to help me identify what’s going on. I need that help because 'of course I believe I handle all stress and nothing's wrong'.....

The Holmes-Rahe Life Change Index is a straightforward inventory of life events that assigns 'life change units' for the events on a scale of 1-100 for how relatively stressful an event is. It includes both 'good' and 'bad' changes, with 'death of a spouse' worth 100 units and getting married worth 50 units-i.e. getting married is 1/2 as stressful as death of a spouse.

While the life change inventory does not cover all changes we might experience, it provides a good indication of the level of stress and the resultant risk for changes in our health status in the year ahead.

If you've been through significant changes this year, take a moment to assess your score on the Life Change Index, then check out the ultimate key to keeping yourself healthy despite the stress.

How to Use the Homes-Rahe Life Change Index 

Using the index below, identify changes you've experienced in the last year and add up the total life change units to see what risk category you're in for experiencing health problems in the next year.

Holmes-Rahe Life Change Index 

Life event	Life change units
Death of a spouse	100
Divorce	73
Marital separation	65
Imprisonment	63
Death of a close family member	63
Personal injury or illness	53
Marriage	50
Dismissal from work	47
Marital reconciliation	45
Retirement	45
Change in health of family member	44
Pregnancy	40
Sexual difficulties	39
Gain a new family member	39
Business readjustment	39
Change in financial state	38
Death of a close friend	37
Change to different line of work	36
Change in frequency of arguments	35
Major mortgage	32
Foreclosure of mortgage or loan	30
Change in responsibilities at work	29
Child leaving home	29
Trouble with in-laws	29
Outstanding personal achievement	28
Spouse starts or stops work	26
Beginning or end school	26
Change in living conditions	25
Revision of personal habits	24
Trouble with boss	23
Change in working hours or conditions	20
Change in residence	20
Change in schools	20
Change in recreation	19
Change in church activities	19
Change in social activities	18
Minor mortgage or loan	17
Change in sleeping habits	16
Change in number of family reunions	15
Change in eating habits	15
Vacation	13
Christmas	12
Minor violation of law	11

Holmes-Rahe Life Change Index and Your Health

Score of 300+             At high risk of major illness--80% chance.
Score of 150-299        Risk of illness is moderate--50% chance.
Score <150                 Only a slight risk of illness--25%.

Pay Attention! 

What category of risk are you in for developing health issues in the next year? What's your score?

Me? I often score well over 300 life change units putting me in the category associated with an 80% chance of getting sick with a major illness in the next year.

So does that mean those of us who score over 300 are destined to get sick with a major illness in the next year? Or if you scored 150-299 that you are part of the 50% who will get sick?

No! What it means is we must pay attention to what we do now and in the next year if we want to be part of the other 20% or 50% who stay healthy despite the onslaught of changes.

The Question to Ask: What Do the 20% Do Differently? 

While 80% of the people in high risk group got a major illness in the next year--what about the 20% who didn't? What did the 20% do differently that helped them avoid getting sick in response to too much change? 

The Key~Let Go of Things that Don't Matter to You; Take Charge of Things that Do 

The problem with experiencing too many changes at once is it makes us feel like everything is spinning out-of-control.

This out-of-control feeling can lead us towards two ineffective extremes--giving in to a feeling of helplessness in which we're powerless to affect change; or taking on a hyper-vigilant stance in which we frantically attempt to maintain control over every aspect of life.

Both extremes--a sense of under-control or over-control--are associated with poor health.

Good health--despite high stress and high change--is associated with having an optimal sense of control over your life. What does this mean?

People who stay healthy despite experiencing a lack of control in their lives share one perspective in common: They feel they have control over the things that matter to them. They don't try to control things beyond their control (i.e. death) and they don't try to control things that don't matter to them (they choose their battles). 

As John Edwards says, "Our actions shift perspectives, whether it be your own or others." Take the actions that will shift your perspective and put your life back in balance after everything seemingly falls apart.

When Life throws you too many changes:

💓Acknowledge the changes.
💙Sit quietly, release judgment and lower expectations.
💚When in doubt, do nothing.
💛Avoid making major life changes for the next year.

Tomorrow is another day. Stop thinking and go to sleep. Wake knowing each moment of your life is new, fresh and vital, and start anew.

Find a way to feel like you have control over the things that matter to you. Focus on what matters most to you, and take action on the things that matter.

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For more than 35 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes letting go and moving forward with life easier than ever before.

Do you know someone who could benefit from uplifting messages? Please share Lightarted Living with them. If you or someone you love is interested in learning more about closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be, join the FREE Lightarted Living mailing list.