Without turning the world off, we can get overwhelmed and exhausted--and the lines between ourselves and others blur, making us lose a sense of who we are, what we think, and what we feel.
To Everything there is a Season
Sometimes my friends accuse me of refusing to 'come down from my mountain' to play with them. They're right, of course. Sometimes this gregarious extravert just needs her own company and time to reflect and gather her inner resources.
Sometimes there's just too much going on in the world and I need to retreat into myself to re-establish my boundaries so I'm better able to give to others from a place of strength and compassion. Without time alone my energies dissipate and my thinking becomes hazy and unfocused.
To everything there is a season....including a time to be with others and a time to be with yourself if you are to remain healthy during difficult times.
Finding Your Balance in Troubled Times
It doesn't matter if you're an introvert or an extravert--when trouble hits, you need to develop a balance between being in the world caring for others and retreating to your inner world caring for yourself. We all have our own 'balance points'--with introverts generally needing more downtime than extraverts--but when life gets rocky, we all need more time alone.
When tragic events occur, we often spend too much time in the outer world worrying about and caring for others without giving ourselves enough tender loving care. Without turning the world off, we can get overwhelmed and exhausted--and the lines between ourselves and others blur, making us lose a sense of who we are, what we think, and what we feel.
It's healthy to shore up our personal boundaries. It makes us more helpful to others in their time of need.
It's good to reach out to others with compassion--especially when they're dealing with loss, death, grief or tragedy. But we can only serve as a support to others as they deal with their sorrow and grief if we have the strength to do so. If we get overwhelmed and fail to refresh ourselves, we lose our ability to be of service to those who need our help.
Tomorrow's Another Day
Stop feeling guilty if you stop to live your own life. It isn't selfish to take care of yourself, and continue to live your life or pursue your goals as you help friends and family going through tough times. You'll serve others better by building up and maintaining your own reserves along the way. Life goes on.
In the midst of crises and loss, remember tomorrow's another day. Take time for your own self care to stay strong and keep your spirits up. Take the long-haul view of the current situation and know your support and compassion will be needed for many years beyond today.
Find an Equal Balance of Love and Care
Take care of yourself AS YOU take care of others.
Love others AS YOU Love Yourself.
For more than 35 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes letting go and moving forward with life easier than ever before.
2 comments:
Sue, well said! I always knew, as an introvert, that I needed lots of time alone to recharge; but I haven't really been aware of extraverts having that need until recently. A dear friend, an extravert who has always been very social, is finding now that she is having some health challenges that she needs alone time on a regular basis.
Yes, Jean, all of us need down time to reflect and re-balance ourselves. Without it, we become a lesser version of ourselves. I'm sure your dear friend appreciates your support and understanding of her need to pull inward. Sending good healing thoughts for her!
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