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Monday, February 11, 2013

I Am Good, I Do Good, I Feel Good--The 'Me Too' Test

Do You Feel Good about How You Deal with Others?

I don't know about you, but I like to think of myself as a person who strives to 'do good and feel good' about the way I work with others. Yet I fall short of doing the best by others on a daily basis. And I know the truth.

You are the only one who sees what really goes on behind your eyes. And you are the only one who can truly know what's in your heart. You can present a good face to others--and also present a good face to yourself. But a good face is not the same as a good heart. And it is so easy to lie to yourself by skipping over the truth.

Does Your 'Feedback' Technique pass the ME TOO Test?

Here is one simple way to test the truth of how 'good' your interactions and intentions are with others.

Think about your interactions with others in the last week.
  • How did you talk to (or about) people who messed up or did something wrong?
  • Did you begin by pointing out what needs improvement or what they did wrong?
  • Were you disapproving and judgmental (in your head or in your words)?
Now compare how you dealt with others (either in your head or in your words) with how you want to be treated.
  • How do you want to be dealt with if you do something wrong?
  • Would you feel defensive if others talked with you about your deficiencies the way you talk with (or about) them about theirs?
Does your feedback approach pass the me too test? Can you honestly say if the conversation was reversed and you were the recipient of the 'feedback' you just gave you would feel good about the interaction and go away feeling you had food for thought?

I have to admit as 'good' as I think I am, I regularly fail to pass the 'me too' test--especially in the conversations that take place in my head. 'So what?' you say.

If you want to feel good and at peace with yourself you need to find a way to make peace with where others are too. Quit 'making them wrong' and make peace with where they are too.

At the end of the day, it is you who is left with the results of your actions and thoughts. Base your intentions on kindness and compassion--and reach out to others in a way you want to be treated.

Good Enough for the Dog is Good Enough for Me

After reading 'The Help', I began to end my daily walks with my dog, Arrow, by telling him, "You is smart. You is kind. You is important."  As I speak these words to him his tail raises higher, his head and chest stand proud and all is well with the world. And as I speak these words to him, I also speak them to myself--allowing me to look for more ways to be kind and do right by others.


Another Way to Right Wrongs and Help Others Remember Who they are

"I was recently told of an African tribe that does the most beautiful thing.

When someone does something hurtful and wrong, they take the person to the center of town, and the entire tribe comes and surrounds him. For two days they’ll tell the man every good thing he has ever done.

 The tribe believes that every human being comes into the world as GOOD, each of us desiring safety, love, peace, happiness.

 But sometimes in the pursuit of those things people make mistakes. The community sees misdeeds as a cry for help.

They band together for the sake of their fellow man to hold him up, to reconnect him with his true Nature, to remind him who he really is, until he fully remembers the truth from which he'd temporarily been disconnected: "I AM GOOD"."

From Sun Gazing

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 For more than 25 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes changing easier than ever before.

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mBraining said...

Hey Sue,

"You is smart. You is kind. You is important."

Your blog is great! And your words are so powerful and useful. The Help was an awesome movie, and I love what you took from it. A great strategy we can all use.

I've posted about your blog on my mBraining facebook page:

smiles Grant

Susan J Meyerott, M.S. said...

Hey Grant--Back at you! You is smart. You is kind. you is important!

I haven't forgotten about writing a review for mBraining--a most heart-felt book. I will do it justice when I get to it!

Hugs, Sue

Jean | Delightful Repast said...

Sue, this is such a powerful post! And I loved the African story: "When someone does something hurtful and wrong, they take the person to the center of town, and the entire tribe comes and surrounds him. For two days they’ll tell the man every good thing he has ever done." This is a post I'll come back to again and again!