Bullies at Work: Deny, Deflect, Persist, Discredit

The Bully's Destructive Template:
Divide and Conquer

When Confronted, Don't Expect the Sociopath-Bully to Fess Up

In my twenties I had a relationship with a man who was also carrying on a concurrent relationship with a colleague I worked with on a daily basis. We never knew about his relationship with the other--each believing the stories he told us about why he was spending time with the other. He told me this very healthy-looking nineteen year old was very sick but didn't want anyone to know about it and he--a doctor--was helping her (She wasn't sick).

On the day we discovered the truth about his deceit and unconscionable lies we confronted him.  And what did he do? Did he break down and confess all? No, he masterfully threw a cloak of secrecy over the confrontation and continued the deception by pulling each of us aside to spread his lies about the other while using his charm to attempt to make each of us feel special. This was my introduction to the artful maneuverings of the sociopathic-narcissistic bully.

Deny, Deflect, Persist, Discredit

Sociopath bullies are not only found in the personal realm, they are also prevalent in organizations--and right out in plain sight for all to see.

Recently on the MSNBC Chris Hayes show, Jeffery Sonnenfeld, Senior Associate Dean for Leadership Studies at the Yale School of Management and Lester Crown Professor of Management Practice and co-author of 'FIRING BACK'  had this to say about former Hewlett-Packard CEO and Presidential hopeful Carly Fiorina:

'If I wasn't on t.v. I would say she had a sociopathic denial of reality. When confronted with the facts, first she denys, then she deflects. When we persist in questioning the truth, she discredits and attacks.'

Can You Avoid the Lure of the Charming Bully?

If there is a narcissistic bully in your midst you will be pulled into their game either as a charmed ally/follower or as a targeted person to attack, discredit, and bring down. There is no middle ground.

Narcissistic bullies are sociopaths without a conscience and without the ability to care. Despite giving the illusion of caring about others they are incapable of loving. They are narcissistic users and manipulators who can do a lot of damage to you and me--and to entire organizations and countries--when we succumb to their false charismatic charms. 

It doesn't matter how smart you are. You can be a very astute and intelligent person and still fall prey to the sociopathic bully's charm and deceptions. All of us--wise and gullible--need to learn how to protect ourselves from their destructive ways.

None of us are so wise we can avoid being pulled into a master manipulator's game. 

The ultimate question for those of us unknowingly brought into the bully's game:

How do we do damage control to our own integrity or self esteem once we've been brought into the game? How do we move forward keeping our best self intact? 

HOW TO PROTECT YOURSELF

Seeing Past the Cloak of Secrecy and Deception

Protect Yourself: Recognize You're Dealing with a Sociopath

Question: 'Is she truly a sociopathic bully'?  How can I know for sure? Sure, I get that niggling feeling down in my gut, but how can I really know? She accomplishes so much and I personally haven't had a problem with her--she seems to like me.'

Answer: As George Bernard Shaw once said, 'No question is so difficult to answer as that to which the answer is obvious.'  

When things start to feel wrong and you can't quite put your finger on what that is--start looking for a unconscionable bully in your midst artfully spreading misinformation and discord in a game of divide and conquer to win in their personal game of control and domination. Then look for a pattern of deny, deflect, persist and discredit.

While it may be impossible to avoid the lure of the charming bully, it is possible to recognize the results of their destructive game--such as creating factions at work; denigrating comments about others; suspicion of others; conflict and unease; and being pulled into private conversations separate and apart from others.

Bullies can be so charming and and subtle in their destruction it can be difficult to see what they're doing. But learn to look beyond their initial engaging behavior to see the destruction and distrust around you so you can be on the alert for a destructive sociopath among you. 

What behaviors to look for in a bully: 

• Playing the Games: Divide and conquer; control and domination
• Divisive and Destructive: Discord now present where there was none.
• Charm and Discredit: charming one person while discounting/discrediting the other. Going around some; engaging and charming others.
• Leads through Manipulation rather than Motivation: Gets others to do their bidding.
• Deny and Deflect: When confronted with truth/facts....deny, deny, deny.
• Persistent: After being called on for destructive or deceptive behavior...he/she starts up again...persistent--never giving up the charge.

Beware: Ongoing underhanded and furtive behavior is hard to catch even after you've recognized it once.  Because we don't like to think poorly of others we may find ourselves just wanting to get on with things--and not wanting to get in the middle of 'someone else's fight'.

Letting Your Guard Down too Soon: Even after we recognize the bully for who he or she is, many of us let go of 'what we know' too soon, and let our guard down too quickly after we solve an immediate skirmish with the persistent bully. When we let down our guard, the charming narcissist regroups and attacks from another angle. 

'Relentless' is the bully's middle name.

Protect Yourself: Know You are NOT Special to Bullies 

When you're groomed as an ally rather than the target for the Bully, its easy to be seduced into believing you're special. 

The charming narcissist will tell you--you have special talents and invite you into her inner circle because of your 'leadership' qualities, while leading you to believe you're a notch above and different from everyone else. The ability of the narcissistic charmer to make you feel special and apart creates blinders that make it more difficult for you to see the bully's behavior for what it is: divisive and disruptive.

Remember, bullies have no true feelings as we know them. No matter how it looks--you are NOT special to them; you are merely a pawn in their game, not a favored person.

Regular rules of engagement do not work with bullies. What you see is NOT what you get with them. You can't just communicate 'as usual' or draw the usual conclusions when dealing with these master manipulators. They know you better than you know them and they'll manipulate your attitudes and actions.

If you're a kind-hearted, trusting person, the charming bullies know you want to communicate in an upfront, trusting manner--believing in the basic goodness of all-- and they'll use that against you. If you're naturally skeptic, the bully is artful at sizing you up and using that against you too. They simply play the game better than the rest of us.

Protect Yourself: Know the Difference Between Motivation and Manipulation

There is a subtle, but important difference between master motivators and master manipulators. They both 'inspire' you to do things. But motivators help you do what you want yourself to do, while manipulators get you to do what they want you to do.

Motivation: Getting others to do what they want themselves to do.

Manipulation: Getting others to do what you want them to do.

Ask yourself:

• Are you being motivated or manipulated into action?
• Do you find yourself withholding what you really think?
• Are you uncomfortable about the direction the process or the conversation is going?
• What do you think to say but fail to speak up about?
• When you do speak up to get your thoughts on the table, are you listened to or ignored unless your suggestions are in alignment with the narcissist's?

Protect Yourself: Step Out of the Bully's Game by Acting on Your Core Values

Once you see the bully's behavior for what it is--commit to clean communication with all others--and consciously protect yourself and the organization or family by staying alert to the bully's self-centered intentions and sometimes charming, yet destructive methods.

When you check in with yourself to guide your actions by your own beliefs and goals it provides you the measuring stick you need to judge if you're being motivated or manipulated. 

Give yourself plenty of down time to examine your own core beliefs and values--and consciously act in ways that are closely aligned with them. Don't be bullied into doing someone else's bidding.

The only long-term effective way to step out of the bully's game is to have plenty of down-time to consider your beliefs and goals along the way so your actions can be internally driven. The more time you spend with narcissists, the more easily you're manipulated by them. 

There is overwhelming evidence that the higher the level of self-esteem, the more likely one will be to treat others with respect, kindness, and generosity.Nathaniel Branden

The Anti-Bully Team Communication 
and Conflict Style

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For more than 30 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes changing easier than ever before.


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Betrayed and Bitter? Forgive and Let Go

'Life becomes easier when you learn to accept an apology you never got.'  Robert Brault

What Hurts?

• Who or what has hurt or betrayed you?
• What are you bitter about?
• Where in your heart of hearts do you feel life has done you wrong?

We All Deal with the Downside of Life 

Sometimes life lets you down--that job you wanted that slipped through your fingers; that love interest who did you wrong; that organization that treated you poorly; that economy that failed you; or that friend who slighted you without apology.

Sure, things happen in life leaving you feeling betrayed and bitter. But don't let it keep you stuck--acknowledge and name what you're feeling--and sit in your sorrow for a while. When you're ready to brush yourself off and get back on top of the world, let it go and move on. Why? Because you're worth it.

You're Made of Strong Stuff 

Face it--you're made of strong stuff and you want to enjoy a fully-engaged life. You have what it takes to move through whatever challenge life presents you--and you're worthy of enjoying a rich, meaningful life.

Think about it--how is that hurt and bitterness you're harboring inside getting in the way of you engaging in or enjoying your life? What good things could you see in your life if you let these soul-killing feelings go?

• Have you failed to apply for a job because you're bitter about the last job interview?
• Did you fail to ask that new person out because the last one hurt you?
•  Have you isolated yourself because you are hurt or bitter about how someone treated you? Have you refused invitations to get together with friends because you're home licking your wounds?
• Is that bitterness about making less than you deserve getting in the way of you appreciating the good things in the job or zapping your energy to look for a better paying job?

Cleanse Yourself of  Hurt and Bitterness

When you consciously cleanse hard feelings out of your soul you make room for more uplifting and positive experiences to show up. 

You will see opportunities you were blind to when you stop wasting your energy nursing the hurt and bitterness. Stop stuffing and harboring your bitter feelings; cleanse them and move on.

'People grow through experience if they meet life honestly and courageously. This is how character is built.'  Eleanor Roosevelt

Care Enough about Yourself to Forgive and Release Hard Feelings

Do you care enough about yourself to forgive and let go of the bitterness? Forgiving and letting go of the bitterness isn't about the other person or organization--it is about freeing yourself to take back your own power and sense of control.

The hardness and bitterness you hold on to takes away your power; forgiveness and letting the bitterness go gives you back your power. So stand tall, stay calm, and remember you have the power to move your life forward.

Affirm your desire to cleanse yourself of hurt and bitterness--and take a step toward doing something that fills you with feelings of self-worth, fulfillment, and connection to life and others. You are worth it. Do it now.

  

'Toss your dashed hopes not into a trash bin but into a drawer where you are likely to rummage some bright morning.' Robert Brault

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For more than 30 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes changing easier than ever before.

If you're interested in learning more about closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be, join the Lightarted Living mailing list. Sign up for free e-mail updates from this blog in the top right-hand corner of the page.

How Do I Know if He's the One? 3 Secrets to a Happy, Long-Lasting Relationship

 'A loving heart is the truest wisdom' Charles Dickens

What is the Secret to Enjoying a Long-lasting Relationship?

• Are you in a relationship with it's ups and downs? Do you wonder if you have what it takes to make your relationship last?
• How do you know if it's worth investing time in a new relationship or mending a long-standing one?
• After facing difficult times in the relationship, how do you even know if you want to continue in the relationship?

What a Happy Relationship isn't...Conflict-free

'Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open'.

George Bernard Shaw

If you think a conflict-free relationship is the key to a long-lasting happy partnership you're barking up the wrong tree. 

All happily married couples have a good amount of 'bark' in their relationship. It's what puts the heat, or bite, into the relationship.  Look at Lucy and Ricardo (I Love Lucy); Alice and Ralph Kramden (Honeymooners); and Bert and Ernie (Sesame Street). We love watching these comedic couples interact because we can relate to their conflicts and differences.

Truth is we all have negative thoughts and feelings about our partners. It's natural. Over time our differences arise and the rose-colored glasses come off letting those petty annoyances surface. But there is something about happy, long-lasting relationships that makes them withstand the test of time and trouble.

Secret #1: Happily Married Couples Keep the Negative from Overwhelming the Positive

'The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.'  George Bernard Shaw

According to Dr. John M Gottman, author of 'The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work' and professor of psychology at the University of Washington and co-founder and director of the Gottman Institute, what can make a marriage or partnership work is surprisingly simple.

'In their day-to-day lives, happily married couples have hit upon a dynamic that keeps their negative thoughts and feelings about each other (which all couples have) from overwhelming their positive ones.'

People in healthy, long-lasting relationships deal with the same garden variety issues that people who break up do. The difference is those in healthy lasting relationships find a way to maintain an overall positive feeling to their relationships despite the negative thoughts and feelings that naturally arise over time.

This isn't to say you should always work through conflict and stay together at all costs. It provides a measuring stick for you to consider. 

How do you create a dynamic in your relationship to allow the positive to over-ride the negative? 

If only one of you works to keep your negative thoughts and feelings about the other from overwhelming your positive ones it won't work--'it takes two to tango'--and 'you can't push a river uphill'. 

Don't be afraid of conflict and run away at the first sign of it--look for ways to put conflict in perspective. Instead of viewing a 'fight' as an ending, use it to create a new beginning to better communication. 

Secret #2: Turn Passion into Compassion   

If we are to live with the differences and annoyances found in our partners we must expand passion to have compassion for one another.

In a happy union, love does make the world go round, but what love looks like over time changes. Family counselor, Gary Strait, noted that while relationships may initially be based on passion, if we are to continue to live with the differences and annoyances found in each other we must expand passion to have compassion for one another.

The longer we're in relationship together, the more acceptance, forgiveness, understanding--and perhaps a sense of humor about each other's foibles--needs to play a central role in how we interact with ourselves as well as each other.  

Secret #3: Ask Yourself--Do I Want it to Work?

There is no subject on which more dangerous nonsense is talked and thought than marriage. George Bernard Shaw

Before you tie the knot, and whenever you deal with upsets in the relationship along the way there is one question you can pose to yourself that cuts through all the layers between you and knowing what to do--'Do I want it to work?' 

You'll know the answer immediately. If you want the relationship to work out you must do whatever is needed to make it work. Your pride, anxiety, anger, or hurt feelings getting in the way will fall by the wayside once you know you want the relationship to work. It will bring you to the negotiation table faster.

When you are in the throes of a new relationship--trust your immediate gut response to the question 'do I want it to work'. Stop overwhelming yourself with expectations and responsibilities for the relationship ('I think she's more into the relationship long term than I am'). You are simply trying to get clear about your current desires and feelings--should I stay or go?

If big red flags come up--don't swish them away--pay attention to what your street-savvy reptilian brain is telling you. Get out and move on! The ultimate secret to maintaining a happy, long-lasting relationship is to choose wisely upfront. It's not good enough to say 'I love him.' You can love someone who isn't good for you.

Are you in or beginning a relationship? Do you want it to work? 

If your answer is NO--get out and move on.

If you want it to work, strive to create more fun and meaningful times with one another. Find a way to enjoy and make a constructive use of your differences. Move into that place of allowing the good times to roll....

'To get the full value of joy you must have somebody to divide it with.' Mark Twain

A Tribute to 35 Years of Making it Work 

In honor of the love of my life, Mark Gibbons, who 35 years ago was brave enough to ask the question, 'Do I want it to work?' I made an excellent choice for a life partner. We're still working it!

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For more than 35 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes changing easier than ever before.

If you're interested in learning more about closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be, join the Lightarted Living mailing list. Sign up for free e-mail updates from this blog in the top right-hand corner of the page.

Living with Integrity Results in Higher Self Esteem

'When you choose to act with integrity, you are strengthened by your experiences; when you choose to act out of ego, fear, anger, retaliation or hate, you are hardened by your life experiences.' Lightarted Sue

Do You Choose to Act with Integrity?

• Who are you? How do you choose to live your life? Would you say you act with integrity?
• How do others view you?  Would friends and family say you act with integrity?
• Are your internal beliefs in sync with your actions? How do you feel when you act out of integrity?
• Twenty years from now, will others say you lived with integrity--and will you feel good about your actions today?

Short Term Unease Can Lead to a Life of Feeling Good


I don't know about you, but when I have to speak up about something I know another person isn't going to like I get that sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.

I don't like conflict and I don't like hurting (or being hurt by) others so initially I'm paralyzed--unable to act--while I ponder if and how I want to open my mouth. Even after I speak up--no matter how carefully I've crafted what I had to say--I still feel uneasy.

But is my dis-ease around speaking my truth a bad thing? I don't think so. For me it is the short-term consequence to choosing to act with integrity. And acting with integrity is what makes me feel good overall about my life.

Small Daily Decisions over a Lifetime Determine  Life Satisfaction  

You are the only one who sees behind your eyes and deep into your heart. Only you know whether you act with integrity. Lightarted Sue

Life is full of intrigue and drama--especially in love and work. Every day we make small decisions about getting in, staying in, or getting out of relationships. Our choices ultimately determine the course of our life and how satisfied we are.

The one constant throughout your life is you--you are the only one who travels in your innermost circle 24/7. You are the only one who sees behind your eyes and deep into your heart. Only you know whether you act with integrity.

Integrity: How do You Experience Yours?

While choosing to act with integrity may feel scary or uncomfortable when you're in the midst of turmoil, after the emotional fog lifts you can see this is what strengthens you for life ahead.

Acting with integrity is what gives you the strength to be brave enough to speak up the next time in such a way as to achieve the best outcomes--despite the initial dis-ease.

Make a conscious decision to be strengthened, not hardened by your life experiences.

Putting Your Integrity to the Test

• What difficult decisions do you face in your daily life? 

• In the last three days--what decisions did you face about how to conduct yourself? Would you say you acted with integrity? If not, why not? What could you do differently to improve?

Choose Your Words to Live By

"Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody's going to know whether you did it or not." Oprah Winfrey

"The integrity of men is to be measured by their conduct, not by their words." Junius

"Integrity means that you are the same in public as you are in private." Joyce Meyer

"You are in integrity when the life you are living on the outside matches who you are on the inside." Alan Cohen

"If you have integrity, nothing else matters. If you don't have integrity, nothing else matters." Alan K. Simpson

"Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous and dreadful." Samuel Johnson

"Nothing more completely baffles one who is full of trick and duplicity, than straightforward and simple integrity in another." Charles Caleb Colton

"Calamity is the test of integrity." Samuel Richardson

"Tragedy in life normally comes with betrayal and compromise, and trading on your integrity and not having dignity in life. That's really where failure comes." Tom Cochrane

"Perhaps the surest test of an individual's integrity is his refusal to do or say anything that would damage his self-respect." Thomas S. Monson

"Goodness is about character - integrity, honesty, kindness, generosity, moral courage, and the like. More than anything else, it is about how we treat other people." Dennis Prager

"Once you get rid of integrity the rest is a piece of cake." Larry Hagman

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For more than 30 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes changing easier than ever before.

If you're interested in learning more about closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be, join the Lightarted Living mailing list. Sign up for free e-mail updates from this blog in the top right-hand corner of the page.

The Workplace Bully's Game: How to Stop Playing

Conscience is the window of our spirit, evil is the curtain. Doug Horton

Putting Your Finger on the Unspoken Problem

The other night I had the most enlightening dream. A nice looking man exhibited bad behavior in plain view against my person. This man calmly walked out on 'the playing field', grabbed me, held me down and put his hand on my breast in plain view of all. His sole purpose was to do this publicly and get away with it while the people in the bleachers looking on did and said nothing. It was an unconscionable act--perpetrated by a man with no feeling about his actions whose only intent was to control me and show his domination.

....For him the thrill was knowing he could openly do this in plain sight and get away with it.

Occasionally I come across people in the workplace I'm hard pressed to understand how and why they do unconscionable things. They don't seem to feel bad about their actions--so I begin to look for the logical, rational reason behind their actions. And that is my downfall--for as Martha Stout, author of 'The Sociopath Next Door' says unlike most of us led by our conscience there are people living and working among us who literally have no conscience.

According to Martha Stout, PhD, author of 'The Sociopath Next Door' :

'1 in 25 ordinary Americans secretly has no conscience and can do anything at all without feeling guilty.'

I don't know that I've ever really contemplated the word UNCONSCIONABLE before now--yet I know I've witnessed unconscionable behavior and my dream captured the essence of the experience and fully expressed the game of the unconscionable bully.

THE WORKPLACE BULLY'S GAME

Controlling others and winning 

The ultimate thrill is domination over other people.

It's really hard to grasp the thought that another human being actually lives life without a conscience resulting in no feelings of guilt, shame, or remorse for what others would consider bad behavior and actions against other people.

Yet when you understand  'unconscionable people' exist it can explain how bad behavior can exist publicly un-protested--without a reasonable, rational explanation that makes sense to those of us with a conscience. It is simply unthinkable that people would act in unthinkable ways to purposefully destroy or denigrate others so we give them the benefit of the doubt.

Unconscionable Bullies: How To Recognize Them 

UNCONSCIONABLE  When I looked up the definition of unconscionable there it was: not guided or controlled by conscience; unscrupulous;  excessive, unreasonable—as in shockingly unfair or unjust practices; extremely bad, unfair, or wrong behavior.

Of course I just thought that meant a person had a momentary lapse of conscience rather than no conscience at all. Boy was I wrong.

On the surface, most people without conscience--or 'remorseless' bullies--look like the rest of us. They live and work among us and can appear quite ordinary--until we get caught up and targeted in their game.

It's easy for us to assume they're 'just like us', never realizing they have no conscience to guide them. They play by different rules and different games. They have no problem lying straight to your face and in front of other people, and it can be extremely difficult to hold them accountable. They are remorseless.

Harvard psychologist, Martha Stout, says you can recognize the 'remorseless' by one of their chief characteristics--'a kind of glow of charisma' that makes the sociopath more charming or interesting than other people around them.

They are more spontaneous, intense and perhaps sexier than everyone else making them tricky to identify and leaving us easily seduced. Fundamentally sociopaths are different because they can not love.

These charismatic bullies learn to show sham emotions from an early age, but underneath they are indifferent to your suffering and demise. They live to dominate you and to win over you.

Charismatic bullies are the every day, common variety sociopaths who are unscrupulous, unprincipled, and unconscionable liars.

Why Do They Target You?

If you are a person these bullies tend to target for their search and destroy missions, consider that a good mark on your character. What these sociopaths envy they seek to destroy.

According to Stout, there is usually something in your strong character structure that makes you a target for the bully's take down.

The remorseless bully can walk into a room, meet you for the first time, and immediately identify you as the one to target. The stronger or more powerful you are, or the more you are loved and respected by others the better target you make.

Make no mistake, they are intentionally trying to harm you and your ability to do your work. Theirs is a game of 'take down'  pure and simple--'a gratuitous sabotage or undermining of your work performance'.

Workplace Bullies Relentlessly Pick Away at Your Strengths

The workplace bullies are relentless at picking away at the very thing you are really good at and often use their seemingly charismatic ways to subtly and systematically turn others against you and your talents, abilities or strengths.

Are you a highly motivated, creative person? Bingo! The charismatic bully will systematically use his charm to turn other's perception of you into that of an unmotivated, stuck-in-your-ways person who needs to be bypassed to get anything done.

Are you a well loved and respected leader among your colleagues? The charismatic bully will sow the seeds of discontent among the group and work to cut off and limit your interactions with others.

It's nearly impossible to negotiate with narcissistic bullies. 'They're right and they haven't done anything wrong.' You are simply an impediment who needs to be pushed aside or run over.

Why Workplace Bullies Get Away with Bad Behavior

Unfortunately its difficult to get help dealing with workplace bullies and you're on your own to decide to stay or leave the situation.

Colleagues may fear getting splattered by the negativity, or fear upsetting the bullies so they retreat and fail to speak up. Still others are seduced by the charm and attention of the charismatic bully and simply look the other way.

Leaders of the organization may be focused on the high profile position the Bully often holds and be resistant to confronting her. Sometimes it is the leader in the organization that is the problem.

As the chart shows below, the most common employer response to abusive bully behavior at work is to deny, defend or discount it.

Until colleagues and leaders in an organization can openly share and talk about the nature of the bully's public actions he will get away with bad behavior every time.

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing. Edmund Burke

How to Stop Playing the Bully's Game

How do good people fight unconscionable bullies? 

You can only do it by grouping together to shine a light on their dark, destructive behavior.

You can not win by going into direct combat with these sociopaths. You can't win because this IS their game. If you confront the bully, be assertive, not aggressive. Talk facts, not feelings. And if you're a bystander, step in.

You must state the obvious IN PUBLIC--and not be bullied into keeping silent.

Once you openly acknowledge and name what's going on, you must continue to talk openly, keeping no secrets for the bully. Be willing to share information freely with others.

What is an organization's role in fighting workplace bullying?

The organization must take an active role in putting a stop to workplace bullying. If those in authority or a position of influence do nothing, not only is the individual person affected, but the whole of the organization will be harmed by the divisive, destructive behavior.

If the leadership does not directly stop the bullying behavior, morale goes down and turnover increases as good people leave the organization.

How to step out of the workplace bully's game if the organization does not support you...

If you do not have the direct, complicit on-going support of the organization, get out of the situation. Life is too short to stay in the bully's game.

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For more than 30 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes changing easier than ever before.


If you're interested in learning more about closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be, join the Lightarted Living mailing list. Sign up for free e-mail updates from this blog in the top right-hand corner of the page.